Toxic positivity is the pressure from other people to be constantly positive while supressing any negative emotions. Saying things like ‘good vibes only’ or ‘be positive/stay positive’ while others are experiencing a hard time can do more harm than good and make people feel worse as well as lowering their self-esteem. Toxic positivity can cause lower self-esteem and make people feel less good about themselves and even go as far as creating physical problems as well. An example of toxic positivity is when people pressure others to be dishonest about how they feel. They are trying to make a ‘silver lining’ and, while having the intent to help, can be dismissive of the other person’s true feelings and can prevent them from having the space to express their true feelings. Some people unconsciously do it to reflect their own emotions when they don’t want the thing that has gone wrong to happen to them or they are uncomfortable with the situation and don’t know what to say other than ‘it will be okay’. Toxic positivity doesn’t allow you to be vulnerable with other people and stops you from reaching out.

Young adults are feeling more pressure to be positive or believe that they should feel that way, and there is more toxic positivity around now than before, especially since people were shaken up by Covid as well as the rise in social media. There are also a lot more young patients that have mental health issues due to the belief that they should be achieving and looking a certain way, even though it is extremely detrimental to their physical and mental health. Some people struggle with unknowingly using toxic positivity, and some put their discomfort onto other people by trying to squash issues that make them uncomfortable rather than trying to hear people out. Toxic positivity in the workplace is also damaging; if someone is getting through lots of work and they are given more, employers may say things like ‘it’s fine, you’ll get through it’ or ‘you’re doing so well’, but on the contrast if someone isn’t getting the work done and isn’t given more, it is perceived that they aren’t capable. People need to learn to be balanced, trying to keep the good and the bad the same, and they need to learn it is ‘ok not to be ok’. The way people frame how they say things is very important, and instead of trying to make a ‘silver lining’ out of things, they should just try to listen to the person and be there to support them.